Life with chronic illness can be stressful, weighty, and overwhelming, but sometimes it’s the absurd little things that annoy you. Life has been a stressful mess the last year and a half, so I figured it was time for some chronic illness humor. Here are a few things that annoy me the most, with sarcastic commentary included.
15 Things that annoy you (or me) about chronic illness
- Proving my illness to random strangers
I love hearing strangers who know nothing about me telling me what to do about my health. Please, tell me more. Your opinion matters.
2. Doing yoga to prove to people I exercise so I can “earn” treatment
No, my painful body does not bend like that.
3. Straightening my hair and putting on makeup
Life is too short to waste time on futile exercises.
4. Comments on my blog or in person telling me that I’m fat and lazy
Really dude? (Yes, it’s always a dude) You don’t have anything else to do with your life? Who’s the pathetic one again?
5. Shaving my legs
Definitely an “I’ve fallen and I can’t get up” situation.
6. People who think that God would cure me if I had enough faith
Because God is basically just Santa Claus or a vending machine?
7. Childproof prescription bottles.
Childproof, you mean adult proof. Let’s give someone their arthritis medication in a bottle someone with arthritis can’t open.
My children can open these easier than I can. Children are resourceful little devils.
8. Ignorant doctors who think they are God, but refuse to listen to their patients.
12 years of extra school and you’re still an ass.
I’m fairly convinced that:
50% of doctors are lazy, ableist, complacent, racist, or sexist.
30% are just okay
10% are pure evil
10% are angels
Doctors: You can’t take #opioids for chronic #pain, I’m going to put you in antidepressants
Me: Takes antidepressants which cause weight gain.
Doctor: Your”re in pain because your fat, if you would lose weight you wouldn’t have any pain.
Me: Throws hands in the air
— Chronic Mom (@chronicmom1) April 17, 2021
9. Clothes that cause itching and pain and don’t have pockets.
I blame the patriarchy. They stole our pockets and inserted painful seams, I just know it.
Here are some suggestions for clothes to wear when you deal with skin sensitivity and chronic pain
10. Wellness freaks that want to sell me stuff.
I am sooooo glad your special shake going for $99 holds the cure for every disease known to man, but it won’t buy your soul back from where you sold it.
11. People who don’t believe in science.
No youtube is NOT a legitimate source of information.
12. Being told that if I accept my pain it will go away
The only people who think this works are people who’ve never experienced pain.
“Pain acceptance” is just another way to blame people in pain for the suffering inflicted in them by the broken medical system #chronicpain #painpatientsvote #opioidhysteria
— Chronic Mom (@chronicmom1) August 11, 2020
Pain acceptance is a B.S. idea created by psychologists who know absolutely nothing about chronic pain. Pain is pain. We’ve known about it for thousands of years. It’s time to stop gaslighting patients who can’t function on high levels of pain.
Pain acceptance is a B.S. idea created by psychologists who know nothing about chronic pain. Pain is pain. We've known about it for thousands of years. It's time to stop gaslighting patients who can't function on high levels of pain. Click To Tweet
13. Pooping.
Thank goodness for the squatty potty.
Everyone takes this one for granted, but when your system stops working, watch out. Since my gallbladder surgery, I can go from 0-60 in 2 minutes. Take it from me, it’s not a good idea to take long walks away from your house when you live with this problem.
14. Not being able to eat candy all the time
I should be able to feel good with just candy bars in my body!
Okay, maybe this just comes from getting old, but trying to find the right foods that don’t exacerbate my symptoms is a struggle.
15. Not being able to go to sleep when I’m tired
I counted 2,000 sheep and I’m still awake
Painsomnia is real, and it’s frustrating. I envy people who can just go to sleep when they’re tired. For me, tiredness and fatigue, are not associated with my ability to sleep.
Painsomnia is real, and it's frustrating. I envy people who can just go to sleep when they're tired. For me, tiredness and fatigue, are not associated with my ability to sleep. Click To Tweet
What annoys you most about living with chronic illness?
I love this and so relate to most of what you wrote. My biggest annoyance besides being in pain every day is when people tell me to “fake it til you make it.” I did that for years and am so over it that I do not do it any more. If I don’t feel like doing something, I don’t. Sorry you are hurting. Keep on writing.
I faked it for years as well, and I’m over it too. It’s a terrible coping strategy!
I’ve had meds for at least 7 years. A couple years after our oldest got medication for her EXTREME ADHD and the same year we began trying different stimulant meds for our son. None of the stimulants worked. Ok, that tells ME, ADHD is a secondary symptom. A secondary symptom to what? Most likely FAS (fetal alcohol syndrome). Son was born early after 2 1/2 months of Russian partying. My stress level was so high, I could snap a large power wire with my pinky. Psychiatrist gave me both antidepressants and anti anxiety meds. I continued to feel PAIN everywhere in my body. Pcp finally did testing for RA & antineuclear antibodies, along with tests for low thyroid. I was sky high for rheumatoid arthritis and ANA. I went to the second rheumatologist she suggested as the first had retired. (Should have been a tip off that we would clash.) first, the man mumbled quietly, never spoke directly to me. (I had watched the staff print in large letters in black sharpie, that I was deaf in one ear & losing hearing in the other.) Unfortunately for this doctor, they had my ‘good’ ear, with hearing aid in, pointed at Mr Mumbles. I heard everything he said & 99% was untrue. I didn’t stop him, I wanted to see what he had to ask me & hear his conclusions. I never got the chance to finish a single sentence. His audio message contained 3 things: it’s all in my head, get CBT (gives me card) and lose weight. I asked him to please stop when he was at the door. He was with a staff member who was telling him the next patient was claiming extreme pain in all extremities. He actually stopped & said, “yes?” I calmly told him, in very polite words, exactly what I thought of him & his “remedies” for me. I reminded him he never let me finish a single sentence, I felt sorry for all the patients who believed him, I told him he never asked once about any stress in my life & I already had morning and evening prayer time with my Lord, Jesus, so I did not need his CBT card. He needed to actually LET HIS PATIENTS SPEAK AND LISTEN TO WHAT THEY SAY. He mumbled into his audio recorder, Psychotic, check with psych to see if patient needs hospitalization. I got a call from psychiatrist the next day. I explained the visit with Mr Mumbles. My psychiatrist said he valued my opinion over an RA who only saw me once. He asked what I did to have them call me psychotic! I said, “ I told him the truth in a nice, calm voice, tho loud enough for other patients to hear me. I never made any threats, I only said I felt sorry for the people who relied on him for help.” My psych laughed & said, “knowing you, he thought you were complimenting him while you dug his grave.” The neurologist he recommended has been great.
Wow, what a terrible doctor! Good for you for standing up for yourself. I always freeze in the moment when I get treated like this.
Brava!!! Good job.
You can repeat #1 about 4,337 times, and it still wouldn’t be enough.
So true!
I agree with all of the above! More than annoyed, I’m so angry with doctors! The emotional pain they cause women, by saying pretty much, it’s in your head and pass you off. I know women who have gone years desperately seeking help for their pain. Now if a man comes in with those same symptoms they’d jump right on it in horror that man has suffered so much before seeking a doctor’s care.
Exactly. It’s amazing home much better men are treated. My dad and I both have kidney stones, but I get them at triple the rate he does. I can’t get anyone to care, much less treat my pain, but he gets more pain meds than he can ever use.
Oh yes! Angry with dr. finding one who will actually believe there is such a thing. I got sent to a ‘wonder’ pain dr. NOT he didn’t believe in fibro. but he said, oh I see you have body wide pain. Hand me another pill. I tell dr right up front do not give me another pill. I am so tired of wondering- is something else wrong with me- I have all these pains and no answers.
Hi Shelley,
Thank you for your articles and website. I have chronic pain and mental health issues exacerbated by the chronic pain and the toxic positivity has caused more harm than good. I have been shamed by my dear “non judgmental” friends. I am told to do alternative therapies (I was a massage therapist until May and helped others find some, even if just a little, relief that they were very grateful for, which also meant I was exposed to all the healthy choices one could make). My star talent wasn’t even in my massage techniques, it was mostly in my ability to actively listen to people in pain, and not push CBD or exercise or mediation, though I have tried these things. If you read about me condition it says it hurts to walk, stand, sit, sleep lol so live, obviously, and yes it is neurological but has a source in my spine. I don’t work hard enough though I have worked all my life since of age, and lately I don’t know if I can keep going. I am sorry to vent on here but because of my mental issues, low self esteem, it is even worse when you can’t function or move, and then your “friends” who thrive and live the life is good, let me know how ridiculous I am for choosing suffering! (it was very detrimental to my mental health). I see now, in the name of self care, I don’t want to be around them. It is victim blaming. My Doctors wanted to send me to chiropractic care and acupuncture and I worked at a chiropractors office! I could get treatment every day there! I have not made all the right choices for sure, I am wearing a giraffe onesie and eating cookie dough with milk right now, and I enjoy those things right now, but I am not thinking of others because my pain is really my ego, and that I seek love and don’t know how to give it. I am sorry to vent on here but I am relieved to find people that understand the abuse of toxic positivity and suffering shamers. Today is the first day I even heard the term toxic positivity and it has offered at least some relief to my mental health. (43 yr old female, veteran)
Does your VA even treat fibro. mine does not.
I don’t know…they won’t even properly diagnose me…I feel they just want to be sure they aren’t help liable for me to increase disability from service connection.